The Wall

I hit the freaking wall. I thought that after finishing my high school running experience I'd never have to deal with it again--but here it is. You know...You're to the 300 M point of the track, rounding the bend, approaching the stretch...And then this invisible collides with your abdomen and forces you to slow down. At that point I was taught to ignore the pain my body was feeling, and instead push myself as hard as I could to the end. Sometimes I was able to suppress the pain, only to have it come back x10 when back to my senses, but most of the time (like so many others) the desire to stop was so strong I couldn't overcome it. Basically at the moment I just couldn't make myself care; not until after did I regret.

I spent the last 48 hours consecutively studying (with the occasional break to keep my sanity, as well as to help my sister because I can't not stress when she's stressed), and with an hour left to go till my final, I can't make myself care anymore. I'm so ready to be done with this class, and I know I had no other options, but I totally burned myself out this time. An unfortunate side-effect of me being tired is that I lose all desires to do anything but what I immediately feel. Usually it's nice to lose all of my inhibitions, as well as any self-conscienciousness, and just say and do what strikes my fancy, but right now it kind of sucks.