The Comfort and Luxury of Mediocrity

Hah. So I stole the title for this entry verbatim from Aaron's last post. I started to write a reply to his, and ended up with something blog entry in length, so I decided scrap that comment in order to spare those reading his blog, and instead wrote of my own thoughts on his subject here. So anybody reading this now has not been spared. And considering the flack I've gotten for not updating this in a while, it should pacify enough people to balance those who feel they should have been spared.

I have definitely never been comfortable with trying new things. If I had 3 friends taking Ballroom, I would not have taken it with them, though I'm sure I would have regretted it later having since seen Clark's oh so remarkable ballroom and shimmy skills. I have gotten better as of late though. As you may know, I tried sushi recently. A big step for my since I hate cooked fish. Those of you who knew me in Elementary school know I was painfully shy, and it has been a gradual process for me yearly to become less so from that point to now. The main differences definitely came when I put myself out of my comfort zone--oh so applicable to my high school track experience as well--and became a better, a more skilled, "runner" if you will. Only then you have to start the process over again with your newly expanded comfort zone. So when I went to Florida it was a huge step for me, but I admit I only did it in the first place because I knew some people who were also going. It turned out to be an amazing experience where I became more confident around complete strangers than I'd ever been before, but it really was a safe bet. On the other hand, when I decided to do a month and a half long English Literature Study Abroad in London knowing no one, I was freaked out. Not only did I know no one, but I was in a foreign country where I didn't know how things worked and had no one to help me. It sounds weird calling England a foreign country, but aside from sharing a common language it really is drastically different, and therefore I stand by my completely applicable statement. I realize that if you switch the "c" with a "p" in cents, and "pound" for "dollar," you pretty much have the money thing down, but the fact that they have a 1 and a 2 pound coin and their nickel equivalent is smaller than their dime totally threw me off. My cab driver upon arrival was very patient in his explanations, fortunately. There's more, but we'll leave it at that--well, that and that I'm really glad they had arrows on the road pointing out the direction of traffic, at every cross walk, because pedestrians do not have the right-of-way there. Anyway, I basically went to England because I'd had such a positive experience in Florida and was looking to experience that again, but also because the very thought of it scared me as much as it excited, which convinced me even more that it was an experience I needed to have... It was no Florida. The first week I was convinced I'd made a terrible mistake and I now had to endure an extended amount of time alone when I could have been home with people I love, and incidentally I'd spent quite a lot of money getting there. My roommates were incredibly nice, but they were mainly about the drinking scene. I like pubs, but pubs are pubs. I admit I wanted to visit all the cliche places as well as those most people wouldn't think of; I didn't want to come home saying I'd never seen Big Ben. Then I met a group of people--who I happen to still hang out with even now, which is quite the achievement--and with them did just that (I swear it took us at least 20 times crossing that stupid road to get a picture of Abbey Road without cars in it), ultimately having one of my best life experiences to date. Point of the matter: I definitely need to put myself out there more, because I like being comfortable way too much. That's really the only reason I ever let myself reach the point of panic and procrastination, because it's hard to have the comfort of the first without the second eventually following. That's my goal for this next semester. I recently applied for an Anatomy TA position. I really hope I'm qualified enough to get it. It would be scary teaching other people about an extremely complex subject, but I know I would gain an infinite amount of knowledge out of it myself. And I really just need to get more involved in life than I currently am. There's way too much to experience outside of work and study for me to stagnate in my current position.